BABY?!?!?!?

In a month I will have my baby girl, its mind boggling that I'm 32 weeks going on 33 weeks pregnant, I just know shes going to be here around 37 weeks given my history of early labor plus my mom had my siblings and I all about 2 weeks early so to go pass 38 weeks will be mind boggling..

 I just remember last summer wanting a baby then not knowing if I could handle two but I knew it was my nerves taking and I really did want another one I just didn't feel like my life was complete. Devon & I were not not trying and honestly I think its the best way to get pregnant. There is no expectations and like I mentioned before I was still unsure from my nerves, having preterm history made me really scared as it would any women.

 A couple weeks after being pregnant and not knowing we were at the cne and I was having fun but not feeling all that great, Devon knew I was pregnant but I was hesitant after all I had been off the pill for months however we decided I needed to take a test. The next day I would learn I was pregnant.

 Now here I am. I'm so excited to meet this baby girl, I dream about her, I see her move and I love her so much. I am nervous how my son will take to having a baby sister, in my eyes hes still a baby. He will just turn 2 around the time she will be born. I will do my best to make it an easy transition but I really don't think there is such thing. However we are a strong family full of love so I know we'll find a way.

 Something else I think about it what if I want another baby? It's like I know 2 is whats best for my family's situation but how would I get rid of the urge in the years to come? In 8 years if I was rich then ya I would probably talk Devon into having another but our financial situation isn't great and our goals are to get a new suv, visit my moms home island and to buy a house that is our goals within the next 10 years and along the way I do want to get married. However with those huge goals there in no room or money for a baby, I tell myself I'll settle for a puppy but really the bond with a animal and child doesn't even compare. I guess life will go as it goes and I really don't know what the future holds and what I may want in 8 years. As of right now I just want a healthy fullterm baby.